Jou woorde is soos takke
Jou sinne, spinnerakke.
Ek sê, “Lees vir my gidigte
Wat proe soos grond en gras en vryheid en vrugte.”
Jou oë word duiwel donker
En jy maak ‘n sirkel met jou hande om die maan.
“Ek verjaar al weer stadig,” se jy.
“Hoe kan jy dit verstaan?”

When I met you I became obsessed with them – made a ruling of my life by them.
A page filled with bullets making up points of how I wanted to do right by you.

Listing ways I could improve myself – prioritising objects I wanted to
own so that you’d love me -
Microwave
Television
Branded clothing.

Things I would deny myself –
Chocolate cake
Friends
Walking barefoot.

Page upon page of numbers written in their margins –
Laugh more
Eat less
Don’t show jealousy.

Letters and numbers swimming in my head
Deliciously coming together to form
The me I wanted to be for you.

One day you came to me like a stranger
And I saw my days were marginally numbered
And the bullets had blown up my only shot at keeping you.

Everything scattered then – like fridge poetry.
And you just left me there….
Listless.

- 17/01/03